What happened to us mothers? We allowed this holiday to get away from us. We allowed it to become commercialized, individualized, commodified, unpoliticized. We allowed it to be about superficial symbols of love—flowers and chocolates and store-bought cards. We allowed it be a time when we, as mothers, sit back and receive personal recognition, instead of a time when we, as mothers, stand up together to make collective demands.

Let’s be clear about what Mothers Day was supposed to be, before it fell out of our grip. It was the brainchild of a brilliant woman, Julia Ward Howe, who was horrified by the carnage and suffering during the Civil War and the economic devastation that followed. She was also heart-broken by the outbreak of war between France and Germany in 1870, with its ominous display of German military might and imperial designs. She used her poetic gift to pen a proclamation against war, a proclamation that birthed Mothers Day.

“Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause,” Julia wrote. “Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn all that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs. ” Her solution? Women should gather together to “promote the alliance of the different nationalities, the amicable settlement of international questions, the great and general interests of peace.”

So here we are, more than a century later, still in the throes of wars abroad and violence in our communities. But instead of coming together to say “Disarm, disarm,” we are content with trinkets and breakfast in bed. Isn’t it time to get out of bed, out of the kitchen, out of the house and into the streets? We should be demanding that our government stop pillaging our treasury by spending $2 billion a week on an unwinnable war in Afghanistan. We should be demanding good education and forgiveness of our children’s college loans, not more money for the bloated Pentagon. We should be demanding that the guns that kill over 30,000 of our sons and daughters every year here at home be banished from the store shelves. We should demand that our nation stop locking up our children for nonviolent crimes, just to feed a disgraceful private prison industry. We should demand that conflict resolution be mandatory in our schools to stop bullying and prejudice, and that diplomacy be mandatory in our foreign relations.

This is our day, moms. Let’s reclaim it and embrace its origins. Our day should not be solely about us, as individuals, but about us embodying the collective desires of mothers around the world—to stop our children from killing and being killed by others mother’s children. No one is going to bring that to us on a breakfast platter; it’s something that we women demand.

Happy Mothers Day.

There’s a good number of us who question holidays like Mother’s Day in which you spend more time feeding money into a system that exploits our love for our mothers than actually celebrating them.  It’s not unlike any other holiday in America in that its complete commercialization has stripped away so much of its genuine meaning, as well its history.  Mother’s Day is unique in its completely radical and totally feminist history, as much as it has been forgotten.

Mother’s Day began in America in 1870 when Julia Ward Howe wrote the Mother’s Day Proclamation. Written in response to the American Civil War and the Franco-Prussian War, her proclamation called on women to use their position as mothers to influence society in fighting for an end to all wars. She called for women to stand up against the unjust violence of war through their roles as wife and mother, to protest the futility of their sons killing other mothers’ sons.

Howe wrote:

Arise, then, women of this day!

Arise, all women who have hearts, Whether our baptism be of water or of tears!

Say firmly: “We will not have great questions decided by irrelevant agencies, Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage, for caresses and applause. Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.”

[Read the remainder of Howe's quote here]

The holiday caught on years later when a West Virginia women’s group led by Anna Reeves Jarvis began promoting it as a way to reunite families after the Civil War.  After Jarvis’ death, her daughter began a campaign for the creation of an official Mother’s Day in honor of peace. Devoting much of her life to the cause, it wasn’t until 1914 when Woodrow Wilson signed it into national observance in 1914.

The holiday flourished, along with the flower industry.  The business journal, the Florists Review, actually admitted to its desire to exploit the holiday. Jarvis was strongly opposed to every aspect of the holiday’s commercialization, arrested for protesting the sale of flowers, and petitioning to stop the creation of a Mother’s Day postage stamp.

Today we are in multiple wars that continue to claim the lives of thousands of sons and daughters.  We are also experiencing a still-rising commercialization of nearly every aspect of life; the exploitation of every possible human event and emotion at the benefit of corporations.

Let’s take this Mother’s Day to excuse ourselves from the pressure to consume and remember its radical roots – that mothers, or rather all women, in fact, all people, have a stake in war and a responsibility as American citizens to protest the incredible violence that so many fellow citizens, here and abroad, must suffer through.

The thousands of civilian casualties in Afghanistan and Iraq as well as the devastating impact of post-traumatic stress disorder on our veterans are just the beginning of the terrible repercussion of war.  As we saw last week an announcement of an extension of the military occupation of Afghanistan, let this mother’s day be a day after Julia Ward Howe’s own heart as we stand up and say no to 12 more years of war.

Laura Kacere is a political activist and radical feminist who seeks to dismantle imperialist heterosexist cisgendered patriarchy and make repro rights available to all. She is currently living in DC.

Although I plan to celebrate Mother’s Day with my own mother (hi, Mom!), I have to admit that my knowledge of the experience of motherhood is somewhat limited: I am not a mother. I have never been pregnant, and I have never participated in childrearing. While I like kids, I go back and forth about whether I will ever have children.

I also have some serious reservations about the ideology of gender essentialism: the assertion that all women are destined to be gentle, nurturing, and accommodating of others’ needs. There are many women who have participated, knowingly or unknowingly, in the oppression of other women—including mothers. Failure to acknowledge this reality amounts to ignoring many issues that are important to women, particularly women who have been marginalized by mainstream feminist movements.

Finally, I have to admit that I regard the Hallmark version of Mother’s Day with a great deal of contempt. As a feminist, I take issue with the incessant gender essentialism in mainstream depictions of mothers in commercials for jewelry, greeting cards, housewares, etc.

However, I respect the original intent of Mother’s Day: a feminist call to action for disarmament and an end to war. In her 1870 Mother’s Day Proclamation, Julia Ward Howe had the following message for American women:

Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience. We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.

These sentiments might not fit on a Hallmark card, but they certainly apply today. I can’t count the number of times I’ve seen the plight of women, particularly mothers and their children, used to justify the inexcusable wars and occupations of Afghanistan, Iraq, and other countries. How telling that none of these warmongering justifications acknowledges that it is these same wars and occupations that have resulted in death and devastation for these mothers and children!

I may not agree with gender essentialism or generalizations of all women as peaceful, but I know that war hurts mothers in so many ways. Mothers have been killed in the US-led wars on Afghanistan, Iraq, and elsewhere; so have their children. These wars have devastated mothers’ livelihoods and created enormous burdens for their children, and have led to a crisis in mothers’ access to food, clean water, health care, shelter, freedom from violence, and other basic human rights. Showing support on Mother’s Day (and every day) for mothers around the world by opposing war and militarism is an act of feminist solidarity.

I am not a mother, but I support the right of mothers, and all women, to be free from the devastation of war.

Women’s peace group CODEPINK is honoring Mothers Day with nationwide events this weekend, including an event with comedian, author, blogger and activist Roseanne Barr in DC and the release of their new cookbook Peace Never Tasted So Sweet: Deliciously Sweet and Savory Pie Recipes from Women Around the World.

• Washington, DC: Peace Festival with Roseanne Barr, Saturday, May 8th, 1-5pm. Location: John Marshall Place Park, 4th St. NW & Pennsylvania Ave. NW, Washington, DC

Along with a feisty peace festival, Roseanne Barr will be performing One Taxpaying Mothers Manifesto just outside the Military Arms Fair on the National Mall. “The solutions that I will offer, free of charge,” she says, “if implemented immediately can save hundreds of thousands of people from the complete and utter doom that is encircling and expanding over the earth right now. All of my solutions to end war, hunger and disease can be paid for with just one month of America and Israel’s combined military budgets.”

More events are planned nation-wide to honor the original purpose of Mother’s Day, a Civil War plea, including:

• Los Angeles, CA: Mother’s Day Peace Pie Bake Sale on Venice Boardwalk, Saturday, May 8th, 1-3 pm [contact Whitney Hallock whitneycodepink@gmail.com]
• Tucson, AZ: Naked Truth Project: a gathering to redefine what “obscene” means in our culture. Sunday, May 9th [contact Mary Decamp mdecamp@q.com]
• Orange, CA: 5th Annual Mother’s day Vigil for Peace. Saturday, May 8th, 1-3 pm. Traffic Circle at the intersection of Chapman Ave. & Glassell St. (near the 22, 55, & 57 Freeways) [contact Kathy Hundemer  kathy@codepinkoc.org]
• San Francisco, CA: Mother’s Day Golden Gate Bridge Walk for Peace. Sunday, May 9th, noon, [contact Nancy Mancias codepink.nancy@gmail.com 415-575-5555]
• Delray Beach, FL: Mother’s Day Stroll for Peace. Saturday, May 8th, 5 pm. Worthing Park, Atlantic Avenue, Delray Beach. [contact Hillary Keyes spiderhill@usa.net]
• Arlington Heights, IL: Mother’s Day for Peace Celebration. Saturday, May 8th, 1-3 pm. Harmony Park, Corner of Vail and Campbell Avenues. [contact Catherine ccaporusso@yahoo.com]
• New York, NY: Mother’s Day Peace Stroll. Sunday, May 9th, 11:30am. Meet up at at Columbus Circle by the statue. [contact Dana Balicki dana@codepink.org 202-422-8624]
• Skowhegan, ME: Mother’s Day Peace Vigil: Gathering with No War Pie signs, pink aprons and the Howe proclamation on Margaret Chase Smith Bridge, Sunday, May 9, noon-1pm [contact Lisa Savage lsavage3@gmail.com]

For more information on CODEPINK local events please contact Rae Abileah, CODEPINK’s Grassroots Coordinator at 415-994-1723 or rae@codepink.org

See-Jane-Do-we-love-you!

New York City, NY: On a beautiful sunny Mother’s Day, CODEPINK NYC and The Granny Peace Brigade lead a group of about 100 on a lively stroll through the Upper West Side and into Central Park. With Carmelina and Walter setting the beat with their drums, we were greeted with enthusiasm at the street fair on Broadway and the craft fair on Columbus, and handed out 1,600 fliers/Mother’s Day cards. WE WILL NOT RAISE OUR CHILDREN TO KILL ANOTHER MOTHER’S CHILD.

Pittsburgh, PA: CODEPINKers in Pitts honored the sons and daughters lost in the wars in Iraq, Afghanistan, and also the children killed in the brutal war in Gaza in January. This year we were honored to have as our guest speaker Regina Birchem, an activist who traveled to Gaza with CODEPINK. We read Julia Ward Howe’s Mother’s Day Proclamation call for peace. The grannies lead us into song. Each year we celebrate CODEPINK Pittsburgh’s Birthday, which is on Mother’s Day, with pink cake. People brought their children and grandchildren to take a moment to honor lives lost and the hope for a better world for all of our children.  There are beautiful photos of CODEPINK Pitts in action with their hot pink banner.

Portland, OR: CODEPINK sent cards to First Lady Michelle Obama this Mother’s Day with a copy of Julia Ward Howe’s Mother’s Day Proclamation for Peace inside, hoping she will pressure her husband to end the wars.  They also held a silent vigil to commemorate the true meaning of Mother’s Day, and to remind all who see us of mothers who are grieving because of the ongoing illegal occupation of Iraq and the war in Afghanistan.  The Oregon News covered the event and there is a great Youtube documenting the action.

San Francisco, CA: About 60 codepinkers and friends came together from around the Bay Area and as far away as Lake Tahoe, for our monthly Walk for Peace on the Golden Gate Bridge. “Free Gaza”, “War Is Not the Answer” and of course, the Mother’s Day pledge were some of the peace messages shared with motorists, tourists, bikers, bridge district cops and other walkers.  Grace of Marin County educated folks on Julia Ward Howe’s creation of this holiday for women coming together to make peace in the world, and our big peace symbol made from dowels, pcv pipe and lots of decorations was eye-catching.  CODEPINK sweethearts Jes and Leslie made it to Baker Beach afterward to enjoy the sun on a bright, windy day!  And in Berkeley, CODEPINK staged the Hot Pink Follies production.

Sacramento, CA: CODEPINK tabled at the annual Whole Earth Festival, and read the Mother’s Day Proclamation on stage at the concert!  See fabulous photos of Sacto women with the Mother’s Day sign.  And watch a video on Sacto CODEPINK’s facebook.

Santa Fe, NM: CODEPINK’s Mother’s Day peace rally including a Choral Recitation of Mother’s Day Proclamation in Tewa, English, Spanish, Arabic, Hebrew

New Rochelle, NY: Gaza trip delegate Felice Gelman reported back on her trip at an event connecting the origins of Mother’s Day – centered on peacemaking by mothers of all backgrounds.

Chicago, IL: CODEPINK produced the MOTHER’S DAY MONOLOGUES… Stop The Violence Now! Survivors Speak, a performance fundraiser for Iraqi refugees.

Asheville, NC: CODEPINKers showed the documentary “Beyond Belief” at Firestorm Café & Books. There was tabling, speeches by mothers whose sons/daughters are being deployed to Afghanistan, and a banner display.

Bloomfield, NJ: New Jersey Peace Action held their 3rd Annual Mothers and Daughters Walk for Peace to honor all women peacemakers.

Vigils around the country: Groups in Orange, CA, Santa Monica, CA (with a freeze action!), Cedar Falls, IA (with a peace concert!), Delray Beach, FL (handing out pink roses, the proclamation, and a flyer with “What can YOU do to stop the war” info), Buffalo, NY (with a walk for peace), State College, PA, and Nashville, TN

And of course, from small towns and cities around the world women knitted pink and green squares for the cozy.  We received thousands and thousands of squares at the Pink House, a brilliant array of the creativity and determination of women to end war and support our visible presence outside the White House.

And hundreds of women took part in our mama mosaic by submitting photos of themselves holding up our Mother’s Day sign.  See the photos on flickr here.  See the full mosaic here.

Let’s make Mother’s Day everyday, by honoring our women ancestors with ongoing bold actions for peace!